By Elaine
No cost shopping spree or another to-do among an endless list leading up to the big day?
In traditional Chinese culture, brides and grooms receive “red envelopes”, literally red-colored envelopes filled with cash, instead of traditional wedding gifts chosen from a wedding registry. Precious time is not spent picking out your future blender and dishes and putting them on a list and guests do not expect to spend their time figuring out what to buy from your registry.
While the practical side in you may say, “hey, that’s not a bad idea”, in reality though, the wedding registry does have its place in the whole hoopla surrounding the planning of a wedding. Although it takes time and effort, putting together a wedding registry is a fun and sweet way for you and your fiancé to spend time planning and imagining your life together. Never underestimate the romance of figuring out together just which sauté pan will help you whip up your first dinner as a married couple. For your guests, having the option of choosing an item from a gift registry takes away the anxiety surrounding what gift to give. Some guests may not feel comfortable making a monetary gift or may find it a tad too practical. Other guests may actually relish the idea of the two of you sitting down together for your “married” meals using silverware that they bought you. Whether the reason is practical or sentimental, a wedding registry is definitely a should-do in your wedding planning.
Here are some tips on how to approach the wedding registry:
* Decide on which store or stores you want to register at. While it may seem obvious that you should choose the store in which you like the merchandise, you should also about about their exchange and return policy. Some stores may even give you cash in exchange for your returned gifts or give you cash back when you return a gift certificate that your guest purchased for you from the store. Is that an option at your store? Also, talk to your recently married friends who registered at the store to see just how difficult or easy it was to return gifts. Was the return process simple and quick? Did they receive good service when they tried to return items?
* Set aside a few hours, a weekend morning is best, when you and your fiancé are not stressed by the weekday grind. Now, we all know some guys who would rather have a root canal than spend a precious weekend morning shopping. So make it a date. A fun one that begins with coffee and some breakfast and give him an idea upfront how long you plan to spend at the store. Then let him have the afternoon off from wedding planning duties to hang out with the guys to recuperate from all that retail experience.
* Finally, choose a range of items from high to low price points. Choose practical everyday items that you know you will use, as well as a few sentimental, “non-necessary” items, such as a nice vase or a leather photo album. Some guests like the idea of buying something “meaningful” instead of just plates and dishes. And pick a few splurge items that you would not otherwise be able to afford, like a fancy espresso machine or that super duper mixer with fifty attachments (if you’re a baker, of course). You never know if your mother’s girlfriend from high school…the one who remembers what you looked like tottering around in your first pair of real shoes…decides that your wedding is as much of a celebration as you and your fiancé think it is. Finally, if you ask me, skip the fine china. My friends who got fine china never ended up using it and the dishes just became another thing to pack and unpack when they finally moved out of their starter apartment. Besides, who has time to use dishes that you can’t run through the dishwasher?
And…it doesn’t hurt to let your guests know that you would welcome gift certificates purchased from the store that you registered at. And though you may or may not be Chinese, let them know you would certainly be happy to receive the most practical of gifts, cash in an envelope, red or otherwise.
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